Summer is a time when we can slow down, take things at a slower pace, and enjoy more time with our family and loved ones. This often means a family vacation, but what do you do when the core of your family, your partnership, is struggling?
Use summer as a vacation from your relationship woes. Step back, take a break from the turmoil, and use the longer days and relaxed calendar to refocus, reconnect, and rejuvenate the love that remains below the conflict and anger.
Take these summer months to nurture your relationship. When you feel frustrated, instead of concentrating on the negative, focus on the positive. Remember to tell your partner what it is you love about them, compliment their strengths, and acknowledge their efforts.
During difficult times, it’s easy for your only form of communication to be angry accusations or proclamations of wrongdoings. Find a way to shift your thoughts and hold your tongue. Positive affirmations can do wonders to nurture your relationship.
Remember to nurture yourself, as well. Take time to love yourself. Give yourself a break and forgive yourself for any insufficiencies, and allow yourself the grace to focus on your needs and fulfill yourself in a way that enhances your relationship. Feeling good about yourself allows you to bring your best to any partnership.
The Good Stuff
Make plans to get out and enjoy life, especially if you do take an actual vacation. Take a timeout from the problems you’re experiencing, and make having fun together a priority.
Take advantage of a new setting and fresh environment to get out from under the “struggling couple” label and be a courting couple instead. Agree to put any current issues aside, and get back to the good stuff. Remember what originally drew you to your partner and take the time to enjoy them and reconnect. Practice positive communication, and if an issue comes up, acknowledge it, but agree to discuss it at a later time and with mutual respect. Don’t let it ruin this vacation time where you are focusing on quality time together.
Keep the Momentum
When vacation is over and you return to reality, work to keep the momentum of your efforts going. Resist the urge to slide back into destructive habits and harboring resentful thoughts.
Remember to keep your communication open and honest, but respectful and with the intention of mending your relationship. Continue to plan private time for the two of you, and plan dates to keep that rejuvenated flame burning. Struggling relationships don’t have to end in a permanent split. Make the effort, take the time. Whether this means counseling or renewing vows, keep your focus on your commitment to each other.
Life is hard, and it can take a toll on even the most loving couples. When the going gets tough, consider going on summer vacation and putting your issues on the back burner.
Put the troubles on hold, and remember to nurture your relationship, focus on the good stuff, and keep the momentum going in a positive, meaningful way. You may find the break from the day-to-day doldrums is just what you need to reconnect and save your relationship.