If, like most people, you catch yourself thinking a lot about the past, ask yourself – “Can I change what happened?”
We all do spend a certain amount of time in a day wondering about things that have passed by.
So can you really change the outcome? Unless you are a time traveler, most likely you can’t. But realize that you could be expriencing the following:
- You are focusing on something that you can’t do anything about
- You are wasting your time (and of those around you) with your preoccupation with past events
- Your thoughts are not where your body is, which might mean that you are not looking aftr yourself
- Your inner “demons” such as your feelings of anger, frustration and worries will engage your thoughts and actions
Let’s consider another approach. You are currently in this life, this situation or this scenario for a reason. And that reason, in its simplest form, will surface from the summary of choices you make over a certain period in time. But by remembering the golden rule, “You are not the sum of the things you did right or wrong”, you will empower you to take stock of one great fundamental fact: that you can change! After all, it’s not about what happened – it’s what you choose to do about it.
So what is the recipe to changing your “Now”? What are the steps? I always like to break down to the smallest building blocks and then rebuild them into a magnificent structure. To do that, I figure out what I really, really want. The trick is to not focus on my needs, because this triggers the survival mode in my mind. In this case, you don’t want to survive – you want to thrive.
Here are my five steps towards “changing your outcome”:
Step 1: Imagine It
Do you remember the younger days when you made carefree resolutions, contemplating everything your parents and other adults got wrong and thinking you’ve figured life out? If a small smile is starting to form on your cheeks now, then know that the magical source of youthful and creative genius never left you. Think back on your daydreams and the “what-ifs” that spontaneously emerged from nowhere to make you feel alive. So if you have an idea of an outcome, write that idea down.
Step 2: Evaluate
Evaluate yourself and where you are now honestly (don’t worry, no one will know). Identify your strengths and what parts of you can improve on. Identify in the areas of your life where your skills are an asset and which areas lie a bit dormant. Write all that stuff down too.
Step 3: Re-affirm
Reaffirm where you want to go. Remember that idea you had in Step 1? Draw a little square on the left side of the page, mark it “Now” and add another square on the right side of the page and mark that as “Goal”. Draw a straight line between the two squares. See this as the straight and quickest path to achieve your goal or idea.
Step 4: Break It Down
Break the “journey” towards your goal down into smaller pieces, and call them milestones (for instance), or mini goals, if you will. Remember each mini-goal is a time for joy, congratulations and well wishes. Experience it! Live the joyous moments of life fully!
Step 5: Get Up
Put one foot in front of the other and start doing what needs to be done. Narrow your vision to only the first mini-goal. Too far? Too difficult? Make another mini-goal between your “Now” and the mini-goal. Start again. Get up. One foot in front of the other. Take another step. Repeat step five until you reach your next mini-goal.
Congratulations, you have started to change the world called “You”. Eventually you will see your environment naturally change with you and the people around you. Then, even situations will start to support your goal :)
If you wish you could change an outcome that didn’t go as planned, what would it be? Share your thoughts with us on this post, and don’t forget to like and share it with your loved ones. Thanks for reading :)