I wasn’t always the Hero in my own life. I was the shy girl, the idealist, the woman who wanted to change the world but really hadn’t taken a single, real step in this direction, the girl who would complain about all of the world’s problems, but, in essence, was part of them herself, the girl who talked about living her dreams but never acted on them. I was the ‘holier than thou’ person. I was one of those people who had it all together – in her mind.
And if you were to ask me how far I had gotten in the real world to fulfilling my destiny…I would stutter and fumble and then out of my mouth would come either a “Well, financially it’s just not feasible right now,” or “I just don’t have all of the skills to make something like that happen” or some dramatic fluff that would hide the fact that I just wasn’t being authentic. This stemmed from the fact that deep down I felt unworthy to do what it was that I really wanted to do. Who was I to have these big dreams? What if I fail? What if people laugh at me?
Every time I attempted to act on what was really important to me, one of my demons reeled me back in to my holding cell, where I felt I deserved to be. Just as I’d gotten out and started smelling the salt of the sea and feeling the warm wind on my face – some part of me began to destroy it all.
To make matters worse, my inner turmoil began to project itself to the outer world in the form of criticism, envy, jealousy, shame, blame and guilt. I had a lot to say about others – they’re not being honest, authentic, living their values…I was the dreaded finger pointer. I destroyed a lot of relationships through this method of soul-cleansing – giving my demons to others. And to be honest, I found myself in some pretty dark places as I, the Hero of my story, slayed the demons on the battlefield of my soul so the real me could make her way out of the darkness. It was downright war – and I’m thankful that I won – although now I know it was exactly as it needed to be.
Ironically, it was the very thing I created to help other people, which ended up saving me. With it and through it, I’ve discovered how to be my own hero.
As you go through the steps, ask yourself where you are right now on a scale of 1-10.
Find the bold and courageous you
Map out your inner battlefield. Who are the key players? Imagining my inner turmoil as a battlefield where I was the hero helped me visualize what I was up against. Which moves would allow me to be victorious? I was playful here, and created my own inner warrior.
Free yourself of the ‘negative’ emotions that imprison your spirit
Acknowledge all emotions as valid and supportive to your current situation. I still ask myself: how does this emotion serve me and my purpose? What is its benefit? By exploring my emotions as they occur, in this fashion, they no longer control me.
Believe that you can and will make a difference
Amidst the hundreds of criticizing voices, there was a faint, serene voice that told me I was premium – that I could do anything I set my mind to. I practiced tuning into this voice and allowed the other, less supportive voices to fade into the background.
Be gentle and forgiving of your mistakes – it’s all part of the process
Don’t beat yourself up for what’s already done. That’s valuable energy that could be spent on realizing your potential. Being a lifelong perfectionist, I had to learn to forgive myself for my growing pains – and to be kind and gentle to my spirit.
Find your truth and then express yourself in your own unique way
Discover your authentic voice and then become clear on how to express it. What is really important to you? What gifts do you have to share with the world? This step drove me into months of deep soul searching.
Let your intuition guide you
Practice tuning in to your ‘hunches.’ Balanced with some perspective, their wisdom will lead you down your soul’s path.
Pay attention to synchronicity and patterns that link events together
Learn to recognize the relationships amongst things. When I’m stuck, stepping back to view my life holistically helps me discover and appreciate the underlying meaning in life.
By giving yourself permission to be your own hero you can begin to play an active role shaping your destiny.