The Secret Behind Transforming Anger Into LoveEvery morning my husband David and I go swimming at the beach in Sydney, Australia. He dives in and I trail along behind him for protection as I am afraid sharks may be lurking beneath the water.

This fear was recently fueled by a neighbor, who while kayaking, spotted a three meter shark. Usually fearless about sharks he admitted that even he “was petrified.” Upon further questioning, he assured me the shark was way out past “our” swimming area (where he has been swimming for 30 years) and that we were perfectly safe.

Online research revealed, that the chance of being eaten by a shark is one to 11.5 million, which makes it less likely than being hit by lightning or being eaten by a crocodile! However, we often hold onto fear that is disproportionate to the event because it makes us feel safe.

This type of fear is created by conditioning and can be an automatic response. Fear can manifest in cultures or be passed down from generation to generation by well meaning people, who may have also been conditioned by fear. Fear distorts how we see the world. Reality is only love, everything else is an illusion.

Learning to observe our inner world is the key to transforming fear into love. Here are a few steps to help you transcend beyond fear when you feel it creeping up on you.

  1. Observe any anxiety or tension in the body created by the fear. Any feelings that take us away from our natural state of peace are a sign that there is room for us to grow and expand into our natural loving state – ultimately to create bliss every day!
  2. Ask yourself “What am I thinking right now and what thoughts are driving this feeling? Thoughts and feelings are exactly the same thing. A feeling occurs as a result of a thought – generally repeated thoughts – that then help form our beliefs. If you think over and over “I love my life” it is likely to be accompanied by a warm feeling of happiness in your body. Alternatively, if you repeatedly think, “my life is difficult,” you will probably feel sad and unhappy.
  3. If your thoughts are unclear, relax by focussing on your breath, take a bath or a walk in nature. If you’re feeling emotionally charged, it is easy to feel overwhelmed and it’s more difficult to observe your thoughts. Relaxing assists you to create the internal space that allows you to observe the thoughts that are creating the feeling. This may take minutes or even hours, however, there is no need to try to make things happen. The thoughts will naturally come to the surface (become conscious) if you relax, go about your day and give your body time to process the feelings.
  4. Challenge the thoughts. Once the dominant thought pattern or belief is obvious, ask yourself: “Are these thoughts really true, or are they just thoughts?” Imagine what your life would look like without the thoughts (or belief). Generally when we have thoughts that are not supporting us, it is reflected by uncomfortable feelings such as anger, sadness or guilt, for example. These feelings are our signal to change our thoughts to support us so we feel peaceful again.
  5. Create new thoughts that support you in manifesting the life you desire. Consciousness of thoughts or beliefs that create any pain or suffering in your life are a golden opportunity to replace those thoughts with ones that fill your internal world with love, peace and gratitude. For example, when a belief such as: “my life is difficult” is replaced consciously with “my life flows easily and naturally,” you are one step closer to your loving, peaceful state. New loving thoughts can consciously be created to support your dreams and desires. Consciousness equals true empowerment, as it gives you the ability to make choices.

Thoughts are only real if you believe in them. Becoming conscious of your unconscious fearful thoughts, gives you the ability to address them. New loving thoughts can then be consciously created that support your natural loving state – one that is limitless, full and complete.

If you’ve been able to face your fears head-on by shifting your thoughts, tell us what your secret forumla is (if different from above)!