According to Indian scriptures, the universe was born out of the union between Shiva (Consciousness – the masculine principle) and Shakti (Energy – the feminine principle). When Shakti (Energy) plays within the context of Shiva (Consciousness), it creates; without Shiva, it operates on negative influences and thus destroys.
The same principle can and should be applied to our sex lives. When sexual energy operates within the context of love and meditativeness, it has a huge potential to create. However, when it is accompanied by negative influences like guilt, manipulation, insecurity or ego, it turns destructive.
Indian mystics have recognized the power and potency of our sexual energy field for centuries. If coupled with the Law of Attraction and its manifestation (which involves visualization exercises) for example, the potency of our creative sexual energy field can be increased by as much as 1000 times!
Sexual energy can be applied to release old habits, fears and phobias, and also to attain a new state of courage, confidence, intelligence and intuition. On the other hand, down-spiraling sexual energy can destroy your personality and kill your creativity.
If you’re wondering, “Am I leading a creative or destructive sex life?” then here a few pointers to help you figure it out:
- If sex leaves you fulfilled and energetic and the orgasmic feeling lingers on, that is creative sex. If sex leaves you drained and hankering for more (or none), it is destructive sex.
- If you enjoy being with your partner and that joy persists even when you are apart – that is a sign of creative sex. If you go through struggle and fights when you are together, but miss each other terribly when you are separated, then these are certain signs of destructive sex.
- If your overall quality of life has improved at work and in your relationships (friends, family and yourself) then you are probably indulging in creative sex. If your overall quality of life is going down, it is likely that you are caught in destructive sex.
Even though creative sex practices require deep understanding, it is important to make a clear distinction between the two so that the transformation from destructive sex into a creative one can begin. Destructive sex happens out of an urge or desire, as if something is missing. Creative sex emanates from a deep heart-to-heart and soul-to-soul communion, a state where you are now enjoying each other.
The key to creative sex is to let the impulse of desire pass over – do not get consumed by it. As you become aware of the desire, you will find it slowly evaporating. It will then give way to a soothing divine inner energy. As both partners start to feel and follow these inner impulses, the divine play starts and ecstasy begins to shower you with a state of lingering and expanding orgasmic feelings.
Though there are many sophisticated techniques to help you reach this state, here are a few simple ones to begin with:
- Bow down to each other in deep gratitude and treat each other as a gateway to divine consciousness
- Gaze into each other’s eyes
- Go to the roof, balcony or garden and enjoy watching the stars together
- Dance together with intermittent sudden stops, called by one of you
- Engage in rhythmic breathing
- Remain in a heart-to-heart hug for a long time
By grasping the distinction between creative and destructive sex, one can begin to get creative and take the great leap of evolution, while enjoying a more orgasmic sex life in that journey.